back by popular demand...

After a 3 month break, I have returned. For anyone curious about my activities while in Ghana, please visit my blog.

Photos from the trip are posted HERE.

the secret life

This show (The Secret Life of the American Teenager) is so addicting and corny and almost every other scene my roommate and I look at each other as if to say, "are they for real? Did they really just say that?" A cross between My So-Called Life and 7th Heaven, the story revolves around a pregnant teenager and her boyfriend who wants to marry her (even though it's not his baby and they're 15...) and her father (awful actor) who is cheating on his wife with the slutty teen's mother and the slutty girl is in love with the father of the baby, and all the while there is this intensely religious girl trying to get everyone to love Jesus and she goes on an anti-abortion campaign and the boyfriend's father who owns a sausage shop, actually wants the 15 year-olds to get married!!! It's insane, but I can't get enough. It makes me laugh.

addicted

The thing about Victoria's Secret is that it has sucked me into the black hole of the $10 Angel Reward card. I spend a given amount of money, they send me $10 off my next purchase. This is a genius idea on their part, but a severe problem for my shopping addiction. I have one, sitting in front of me, and as all my friends can attest, I do not need to buy anything more from Victoria... yet I can't throw this $10 card away. It's going to sit on my desk until probably tomorrow. At that point, I will reluctantly drive myself to Victoria's Secret and proceed to spend way more than $10 to merely justify having the free $10. Vicious cycle. And I love it.

eggs

It recently occurred to me that the eggs in the egg carton are not from the same chicken. This means that when I whisk together 2 eggs for an omelet, I am smushing the gooey fetuses of two baby chickens who are not even related! They don't even know each other because they came from 2 different chicken butts probably from 2 different coops, maybe even different farms!!! It's honestly very morbid.

Bring on the oatmeal.

Tonic Immobility on Sharks

Originally aired last July, Michael Rutzen (Sharkman) is able to hypnotize sharks into a sleep-like trance by gently touching them.  When inverted, a shark reaches an almost paralyzed state.

In the below clip, the Sharkman is able to gently massage the nose, causing the shark to practically go limp, allowing him to guide the body upwards to invert the shark, then balancing it on his hand.  In another clip (not attached, you have to watch Shark Week to see it), he touches the animal's nose with both hands, immobilizing it, sending the shark limp, and sinking 75 feet into the sea before Sharkman let go.  Once he releases his touch, the shark resumes and swims off.  The interesting thing about it, is that after he introduces himself with just a small touch, the shark becomes curious, coming back for more.

When he attempted tonic on a great white, he experienced something even more incredible.  The first great white, a 10 foot female, allowed him to use tonic on her for just a moment, sending her into the sleep-like trance.  It was only for a short moment, and afterwards, she swam around him slowly, showing her belly-- a submissive gesture he had never seen before.  About to attempt tonic again, something scared her off.  From beneath them emerged a 15 foot great white, also female.  The Sharkman slowly introduced himself to her by gently stroking her side as she passed him.  She swam back around, accepting him.  He very gently took hold of her dorsal fin, and took a ride.

an expansion of Crayola's 64

Tonight over dinner I decided to come up with new colors, more descriptive and specific than the basic box of 64 by Crayola.  The list we came up with:

Hooker Lips Red

Pale Yellow will now be named "Snow"

Choke-hold Blue

Spank Me Pink

Vericose Purple

Frog Slime Green

Dandruff White

Camel Spit Brown

Eviction Day Black (more of an emotional color)

test tube cows?

Keep in mind, we annually consume 50 pounds more meat per-capita than Americans did in the 1950s. This produces a lot of waste, methane, environmental problems, and obviously high cholesterol. According to an article written a couple months ago by the Green Lantern (illuminating answers to environmental questions), "Raising and slaughtering livestock on a large scale doesn't just result in massive methane emissions... it also creates waste-disposal nightmares, squanders valuable land, and guzzles an alarming amount of fossil fuel. " An alternative, though not completely carbon-neutral, provides an interesting theory: Lab-Grown Meat. Don't get me wrong-- I love steak and burgers and everything else, but did you know:

"According to a study, creating a pound's worth of beef releases the same amount of greenhouses gases—the equivalent of 36.4 pounds of carbon dioxide—as driving a car 155 miles at 50 miles per hour. And that's an underestimate of the industry's total impact, since the study didn't account for emissions from farm equipment or the fuel expended on transporting product from killing floor to supermarket."

Also consider the amount of land needed to produce the massive amounts of feed for cattle. "A cow must consume 7 calories of grain in order to produce a single calorie of beef. And once you factor in the petroleum required to raise that grain—a process that involves the use of synthetic fertilizers...—the ratio of input calories to output zooms to 35 to 1."

How would this work?

"Tomorrow's beef would be grown in bioreactors, filled with a solution consisting primarily of water and glucose. Animal stem cells would be placed in these bioreactors, where their proliferation would be abetted by the presence of growth factors." Not gonna lie, I have no idea what that means, BUT this would save SO much on energy costs compared to the 'raising for slaughterhouses' way we do things now. You won't have to worry about waste management- what do with bones and leftovers you can't use. You won't have to worry about manure contaminating water supplies. Unfortunately, we're still probably decades away from being able to buy lab grown burgers, but it's something to work towards! However, I have to wonder, all of these claims sound familiar. Too much waste, too much energy... oh wait, that's HUMANS! Let's just put everyone in a test tube like ant-farm and then humans will stop ruining the Earth! And then cows can just "rooooaam free.... as free as the wind blows.... as free as the grass grows.... something something...."

nutritional value of gatorade

Meredith: I'm sick.
Me: Have you taken anything? Medicine? Tea?
Meredith: Tylenol Cold & Sinus
Me: Maybe you should have some tea.
Meredith: I don't need need tea, I have gatorade.
Me: Yes but gatorade rocks for hangovers, and sports... You need tea and rest. How about green tea? That's got all kinds of good stuff in there like... vitamins and green things...
Meredith: I don't need it. I have gatorade.
Me: Gatorade is a sugary sports drink. Like Kool-Aid for athletes, that's it!
Meredith: AND ELECTROLYTES!!!


(I always thought Gatorade fought dehydration, hence why it was an awesome hangover necessity.)

Turns out, Meredith was right too.

"Gatorade Thirst Quencher contains a blend of lab-tested electrolytes – sodium, potassium and chloride – to replenish the minerals athletes lose through sweat during exercise and competition. (1, 2, 3) Electrolytes help regulate a number of body functions, and athletes with a substantial electrolyte deficit may experience muscle cramping, heat stress and fatigue. In addition to replacing what is lost through sweat, the electrolytes in Gatorade trigger activation of the body’s thirst mechanism, encouraging athletes to fully hydrate themselves."

bicycle

In a few weeks, I'll be going to the beach with my family- my mom and my brother. I'm really excited because we haven't done anything as a family in a while, and it'll be really good to spend time with my little brother (who is almost 21-- I can't wait!). At any rate, my mother called this morning to ask what we should do while we're at the beach. Now, when I go to the beach, I have a few things that are "must do's". This includes (and don't be disgusted) pistachio ice cream, gyro from Gus&Gus, Thrasher's fries, and Louie's pizza. Outside of that, I have to play the frog bog at Funland until I win something, and I have to ride the big boat that goes up real high, and usually go in the haunted house, and play skiball, of course. This all occurs when I'm not laying on the sand, which is the majority of the day. I wake up, throw on a bathing suit, and walk down to the beach, set up camp, and go back to sleep. I'll wake up to read or sing along quietly to my iPod, or attempt to go in the water and decide it's too cold, walk up to the boardwalk for lunch, and back to my base camp on the sand until about 4:30. At which point, I go back to the house, shower, and start cooking dinner. It's all extremely relaxing and chill and drama-free.

My mom asked what "activities" I'd like to do. She suggested deep sea fishing, which I'm ok with, as long as some giant fish doesn't steal my rod and me being wrapped in fishing line and going overboard and wrestling with some enormous marlin (Nemo's dad was named after this) and then drown and slowly sink to the bottom of the sea and then have my body devoured by hungry sand crabs.

Another suggestions was to bring our bicycles.

Mom: Do you even have a bicycle?

Me: Yea. It's green. Remember how you stole it from me and put that stupid squishy banana seat on it? It's still in your garage.

Mom: Um... No I got a new bike a couple years ago.

Me: That doesn't negate the fact you stole mine first. But that's fine. You can use your bike, and I'll just take mine back.

Mom: I don't think it's in the garage.

Me: Well, it was there last time I checked.

Mom: Ok but I don't think it's there now.

Me: Why? DID YOU GET RID OF IT?!?!

Mom: Well...

Me: You can't just adopt something that's not yours and discard it when you get one of your own! Now I don't have a bike!!!

Mom: Well I'm sorry hunny.

Me: Fiiiine....

*sigh*

The hybrid bike I want: K2 T-9 Crosswind; $400. So pretty...

and the mountain bike I want: Novara Bliss 1.0 on SALE for $640

takes me back...

Once upon a time there was a king who loved cheese but it attracted mice. There were too many mice so the king brought in cats to chase away the mice, but then there were too many cats! So the king brought in dogs to chase away the cats, and then lions to chase away the dogs, and then elephants to chase away the lions, and then had to bring back the mice to chase away the elephants. The mice wanted to stay, so the king decided to share his cheese with the mice.

The End.

Don't ya just FEEL the warm fuzzies???

for the next present-giving holiday...

The NERF NSTRIKE VULCAN EBF-25 YELLOW is an "awesome, fully automatic dart cannon!" Fires at a rate of up to three darts per second! Dart refills sold separately. Please budget to include an extra pack with the N-Strike Vulcan. Thank you. :P

BRIDGE

Everything is starting to come together! Today, I was contacted by the BRIDGE Volta Office to begin the logistics for my trip to Ghana. So excited! Friday I'll be getting my yellow fever vaccine, and getting the rest of my vaccines in the next few weeks. Next step is to book my flight, and then I can apply for my visa with the Ghanaian Embassy (conveniently located in DC). BRIDGE helps build sustainable village-based organizations in Ghana so groups are better equipped to reduce poverty. I can't wait to see what the assignment will be, but I wish it was 2 months from now already!!!

hydropolis

The world's first luxury underwater hotel was planned to open originally last year, off the coast of Dubai. I wanna know, why the hell it's not open yet, because I wanna go!!!

For more information, visit Hydropolis.com but the web site is flash-freaking annoying.

waterworld

I've mentioned before that I really don't need a lot of space. In today's real estate market, that is a VERY good thing. Honestly, I briefly considered living in a trailer. I think it's great! Completely affordable, just my size, AND I'm such an indecisive person and if I felt like living somewhere else, I just pick up and go! It's so convenient! Well, I'm a pisces. The alternative is so much more fun!

Inspired by: Captain Conrad

www.nataliedee.com

Houseboats I would LOVE to live in:


Little less "Swiss Family Robinson" a little more modern:


Funny looking, but still clearly in my price range:

Mission Control, can you hear me???? The Jetsons go subsurface. The Jellyfish 45 model (last) is actually a design available to real life people (i.e. not the Jetsons). But this first one is my dream house.

By Popular Demand: The Jellyfish 45 is within reach.
*drumroll* $2.5 million.

"Jelly-fish 45, designed by Giancarlo Zema is a floating dwelling unit for up to six persons. It's spacious dimensions are 10 metres high with a diameter of over 15 metres. The Jelly-fish 45 would be ideally situated in sea parks, atolls, bays and seas rich in flora and fauna. The Jelly-fish 45 allows the sea dwelling owners to live either above or below sea level in perfect harmony with the ocean environment.

It consists of five levels connected by a spiral staircase. The top level is 5.6 metres above the sea level and has been kept for study rooms. The next lower level is situated at 3.5 metres above the sea level and contains the night time zone while the next lower level at 1.4 metres contains the daytime zone with a kitchen and bathrooms. The lowest living level at 0.8 metres above the sea level is semi-submerged and has been kept for
the guest room, bathroom and technical spaces."

For more extreme houseboat designs,

go to Web Urbanist.

marco's baby

Friday night, Marco (our dishwasher at the bar) had a little baby girl! His wife called to say she was in labor, and after convincing Marco that he should leave work to go to the hospital, (Dan stepped in as the temporary dishwasher-- only to surface at the end of the night to say that Marco is extremely underpaid), Marco headed off to see his daughter being born. Steve (one of the owners of the bar) offered his credit card for any expenses like a taxi ride home, food, etc. Marco, put the credit card on the hospital payment form... the bill for having a baby in a hospital is around $15,000 without insurance.

Steve: "I own that baby now. 14 years... they better be next to Marco washin dishes!"